A Man’s World #4: Anxiety Is The Biggest Weight For A Young Man

Let’s talk more about what’s not being talked about. I have talked about it in previous posts and I am going to about it again because it’s that important. I will continue to talk about it too.

I have been there. I am still there at times. I know you are too. Again, for those of you new to my blog I am a 30 year old young man, I am born and raised in Massachusetts, I attended Massachusetts colleges, I am a certified public accountant, I have a beautiful wife, I have a handsome dog, I don’t own a home, I have been on a two year infertility journey, I am the first person in my household to go to college, and I have a brother who has his own struggles. I understand what you have been through. I get it. I can relate to you.

Anxiety is the biggest weight on a man. It’s not easy to talk about. It’s very hard to talk about. Especially, as a young man. Please talk about it. Please seek help from your inner self, from your coaches, from your mentors, from your peers, and from your family.

I know directly how anxiety can put you in a dark hole and make you feel alone, isolated, and disconnected.  COVID exacerbated this. I can’t even imagine (especially for younger men) what it must have been like to miss your senior prom. Miss your high school graduation. Miss your college graduation. Miss your senior year of sports. I feel for you. I did not experience that myself but I can understand how that still sticks with you to this day. Express your feelings, let it out, you need to, don’t let it consume and take you down anymore.

As a young man, you need structure in your life. You need collaboration. You need community. You need coaches. Depending where you were at during your life during the pandemic you lost this. All of it. It wasn’t fair.

For those that graduated college at the end of the pandemic and went right into the workforce, I feel for you. You get criticized for not talking on the phone, for not knowing how to be involved, for not being a working man like those before you. It’s crazy. I’ve seen it, I’ve heard it.

You need to be supported. You need to be understood. You need to be heard. Respectfully, openly, and honestly let others know what you are experiencing. It is going to take time, I know that. You are going to need to find people to trust, I know that. Once that weight of anxiety is off of your chest you will be able to breathe again.

I am in a far better spot than I was four years ago. I still have things that make me anxious but I am much better at dealing with them. The two biggest things that make me anxious as I am writing this is my infertility journey and my work. My infertility journey beats me up and makes me anxious because I feel like I am letting my wife, my parents, and my grandparents down. My work makes me anxious because there is always a push on extreme productivity and just putting your head down and getting to work.

So how do I cope with this? Internally, I speak to myself all the time. I find it soothing and calming. I talk to myself honestly and assess the situation. I look forward to how I can create positive solutions for myself. I talk to close peers at work that I can truly confide in. I try to implement initiatives at work that benefit those around me that are struggling. I speak to my wife openly and honestly in a constructive and positive way. I volunteer my time and try to be a better person where I can everyday by finding purpose and meaning.

Start by being even more self aware. Talk to your inner self. Talk to those you have already built trust with. Talk with your family members you are closest with. Come here and talk to me. I am here to be a mentor, a coach, and a natural resource for you. You got this, I know you do. Lift that weight off your chest. I believe in you.

Be Well, Stay Young.