A Man's World #8: Listen To Your Heart, Be Weary Of "Advice"

If you are an incoming college student or a current college student you will relate to this one. Did you have a high school girlfriend before going to college? Do you currently have a girlfriend in college? Are you contemplating having a girlfriend in college?

I have been in all of these situations. In your situation has anyone said to you "Don't worry about it, when you get to college it won't last anyway. College is for fun, it's not for relationships, don't stay tied to one person. You have your whole life to love someone, you don't love this person"?

I have heard all of those phrases. I envision you have heard them in one fashion or another too. Let me tell you something. I have lived through it. I have been through it. I will tell you first hand that I wish I could have thought better for myself when I was younger. I listened to the "advice" and I made decisions I wish I never made.

For example, I met my now wife in college. During college, I knew I loved her and I knew I wanted to be with her. Because of those false voices in my head I made so many decisions that I shouldn't have made throughout college. I got shacked up with girls I shouldn't have. I drank way too much when I didn't need to in order to cope with my feelings. I did the things that I did just to fit in and seem cool. Let me tell you, it's not worth it. Listen to your heart, and whatever happens, happens.

I am an advocate of love. If you feel love and you think it's love, go for it. Don't let it slip. Take it while you have it.

I almost lost my now wife post college too. Again, because I was so programmed to never settle down. That I am young and to explore and experience more. I wish I didn't listen to that "advice" but I did. In my early professional years I did some things and made some choices I wish I didn't make. Again, involving both women and alcohol. I almost lost my now wife then because of my foolishness.

It took me until a few years ago to open up my eyes and smell the roses. I began to get myself set and structured. I focused on myself to get my mind right. Then, from there I was able to focus outward. I was able to give my full attention to my now wife and remove the foolishness from my life.

I am in a place now where I have my own outlook on life. I have seen so many things. I have experienced so many things. I am able to take a step back and understand why I was given the "advice" I was given. Now, I am able to think for myself and make my own choices.

My life has never been better. My advice to you. Take the "advice" you receive with a grain of salt. Take a step back, assess the situation, and make a thoughtful decision on your own or with the guidance of trusted friends and family. If I had known that back then I would have avoided many unneeded situations.

Have you been through this before? Are you there now?

Wherever you are. I am here for you, I understand.

Be well, stay young, brother.

-The Unmodified Opinion